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Be happy, or be right?

Lately, I have tried to avoid drama in my life.

Take my mediterranean flatmate, who undoubtedly has lots of good sides. He came back from his parents’ place on Monday and left to visit friends on Thursday morning. It is his turn to clean the flat’s kitchen/ bathroom this week, yet he will come back Sunday night – and of course he did not consider doing it on his free Wednesday afternoon before leaving. I am here all weekend and see the “dirt“, if you want to call it that. Do I not clean because well, it is actually his job, and feel annoyed every time when I am confronted with the uncleaned bathroom? Or do I take 20 minutes to superquickly clean what annoys me the most and am happy? (and maybe make a snark comment on Sunday eve ;)?!)

Or at the butcher’s. No matter when I go, I feel there is a crowd incapable of forming a queue. Every time the question “who’s next?“ is asked and it would be my turn, some elderly lady busily pushes through. Do I tell her that it is my turn and go home five minutes earlier? Or do I smile at her and let her have her way, just because I choose to do so?

Another favourite of mine. A colleague. We once kissed (… I have learned that lesson: never f*** the company) and then all hell broke lose. He remembered he was having a girlfriend, then he switched back to flirt mode, then he avoided me, jada jada jada. His mood swings were incredible. To cut a long story short, I got over it taking the high road, much promoted in adult circles, and totally annoying. We have by now established a formal working relationship again. Recently, he has been back to his jada jada self. Formally shaking my hand one day, writing ambiguous text messages under the pretence of a stupid reason the next minute. Do I tell him that his choice to stay with her obviously is not working and that he should stop flirting left and right (especially when I am standing right…)? Or do I stay on my working relationship level and remain friendly, mentally roll my eyes at his immature behaviour and daily thank my life that it is not me who ended up with him after all?

I do not want drama. It is exhausting, and it is annoying, and in the end does not make me happy at all. Sure, it might seem like a weak position, and the rebellious part of me sometimes stomps her foot and says “But…!“, yet being right has never won me anything but the realization that it comes with too high a price.

Additionally, I have noticed that people do not like it if they can not ruffle my feathers – so the high road sometimes comes with the satisfactory feeling that by avoiding drama in my life I have undoubtedly shown them I am too content to be affected by the drama (i.e. chaos, confusion, immaturity, loneliness, boredom and whatnot) in theirs. Not a bad score, if you ask me.

Author: carasmelody

daydreamer, hopelessly hopeful, I love the power of words, I love poems, words are soulfood

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