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Before and after

For too many years to count
in my mind there was this incision
before him, after him

the before him me
the in-a-relationship-me
the me that supposedly had it all

the after him me
the adrift me
the me that had all the chances and no idea where to go

For a while now
in my mind there has been a new turning point
before me, after me

the before me
the I-want-what-I-had-before-because-it-is-safe me
the me that was scared of everything she actually felt
the me that felt like she was waiting, like her life was on pause

the after me
the sparkling me that wants it all
the me that cherishes every part of the puzzle that life is
the me that feels curious about every chapter yet to come
while consciously writing the current one
the me I actually like

Author: carasmelody

daydreamer, hopelessly hopeful, I love the power of words, I love poems, words are soulfood

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