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Something to look forward to

Hey everyone,
it is me, rising from my mindless comfort zone! I am sorry there has not been any real blogging lately. Usually, I am inspired by life and the people in it and just write whatever I feel…♡

However, this Lockdown life rarely allows new input to stir my days. I normally get up, have coffee, do Yoga and teach my online classes. I prepare online classes, correct online homework, have lunch. Answer huge amounts of emails daily. Prepare some more. Go for walks, do some housewifing, cuddle the cats or my boyfriend. Tv or book? Major decision when it comes to evening plans. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. It has been more than ten weeks now, and I still daily press repeat. I wonder when this button breaks as daily I press more furiously.

Do not get my wrong, this life is not stressful for me. I am home all day. I know what to expect of each day, life is in fact a comforting regularity. I have gotten used to online teaching, and am ok withbthe lessons. Talking to a screen gives me no satisfaction, but I am still teaching studebts and some remind me of that by being there.♡ Yet the monotone of it is exhausting and slowly wearing me down. I am managing, as I guess we all are, as best as I can. As a teacher, as a girlfriend, as a flatmate, if you want to be ironic, as a good citizen obeying the rules of safety, as a pet owner, as a patient in the dr’s office, as an employee.

I miss being a daughter. A sister. A granddaughter. A good friend. A colleague. A team member. A traveller. A shopper. An explorer. A ski bunny, even. A planner. A stranger on the train to talk to. A dancer. A dreamer. An unknown girl smiling back at someone on the street. A yogini in a group. A driver and sing-along-with-the-music-girl. An admirer of something. A bookshoplover. A companion for a good glass of wine, or a pizza. A person.

I miss life. This halflife is not what I, what any of us have signed up for – politicians, researchers, doctors, paramedics, nurses, kindergarden teachers, home office junkies and stay-at-home-mums and all the other ones dealing firsthand with the consequences of the C-I-refuse-to-name-it included. I know this. We are all doing the best that we can, I firmly believe that.

I just miss life and actual people and smiles and a lightness in my heart, and something to look forward to. Therefore, I try to visualize what I look forward to most and hope my good vibrations spread. Have day full of joy! ♡

Author: carasmelody

daydreamer, hopelessly hopeful, I love the power of words, I love poems, words are soulfood

One thought on “Something to look forward to”

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